Sometimes, you are so deep in the trenches that you can't even see the mess you are in until it is too late. Human beings have the tendency to idealise the things that they want. Studies have shown that being in "love" actually makes your lover seem more attractive, intelligent and desirable than they really are.
What are some signs that it is time to leave your relationship?
1.) Physical abuse – if this is present in your relationship, from EITHER partner, it’s time to go.
2.) Addictions – if your partner has an addiction and refuses seek help for it, stop rescuing and save yourself.
3.) Cheating – you or them – infidelity does not give a relationship a foundation of trust.
4.) You have grown apart – if this is happening, be truthful with your partner. If neither of you wants to find a way to grow together again, there’s no point in continuing.
5.) Disrespect - someone mistreating their partner through constant verbal abuse, mind games and degradation. Get out now!
6.) Communication – vital to any relationship and if it’s not happening, get help. If it’s beyond that, do yourself a favour and move on.
7.) It’s unbalanced - if you are treating them like royalty while they leave you feeling like a worthless peasant, then it's time for you to get going.
8.) Ego-based - if you are in a relationship where you have realised that you somehow have let your ego fool you into dating someone who you would never date, whether it's because you're lonely or to feed your ego, then it's definitely time to re-evaluate.
9.) It’s only physical - if the only thing you have going in your relationship is physical attraction and sex, eventually it will come to an end.
10.) It’s always a drama - if your relationship is a soap opera and you're not an actor, then it it's time to get the hell out of it. End of story.
These are guidelines only and if you are with someone who is willing to get help – either alone or as a couple – then go for it! Otherwise, careful consideration is needed about moving on to a life and a partner that is better suited to a healthy relationship. If you feel you need to become healthier yourself, don’t delay. Life is too short to not enjoy the best there is.
Couple coaching vs couple counselling
Coaching is often confused with counselling as counselling has been around for a longer. Both disciplines are rooted in the psychological disciplines of the great masters such as Sigmund Freud, Erikson etc and practices such as NLP. Here is a brief overview of counselling, coaching and the differences between couple coaching and counselling.
Counselling looks at where the issues come from and what's lurking about in that place (deep, often heavy – however sometimes necessary for some people)
Coaching looks at the fact that this is how you are so where to from here? (positive and light)The practice of Life Coaching arose out of athletic coaching in sports and is broadly defined as a collaborative process of helping someone improve performance or satisfaction in some aspect of their lives.
In contrast with psychological counselling or therapy, which is often focused on pathology rooted in past experiences or flawed thinking processes (cognition), Life Coaching is focused more on the here and now by working towards improving the present as well providing guidance and tools for achieving future goals in a client’s professional, relationship, creative or even spiritual aspects of life.
Essentially, counselling clients are looking to heal; coaching clients are looking to get results (according to whatever goals they set); therapy clients want to understand why they feel what they feel; coaching clients want to take action to change their lives.
Couple coaching is quite distinct from couple counselling in these ways:
· Couple counselling will focus on the individuals and what they are doing wrong that creates the current conflict in their relationship and will address those issues.
· Couple coaching doesn’t focus on individuals but coaches the relationship itself. The couple are asked to formulate what type of relationship they want and the coaching will guide them towards achieving this.
· Couple counselling will look at the past and what each person did in certain situations, what was said and done in each situation that caused conflict. Then the counsellor will advise on changes in behaviour etc and give couples tasks to perform to institute that change.
· Couple coaching starts with a blank slate – what happened in the past stays in the past.
· Couple counselling allows each partner to list the ‘sins’ of the other partner.
· Couple coaching won’t allow partners to list each other’s ‘sins’ but will encourage each one to become aware of and take individual responsibility for their behaviour, attitudes and beliefs that are causing harm to the relationship. Then each person will identify what they need to do/change to create a healthy relationship.
· A couple counsellor will give advice.
· A couple coach will not give advice although suggestions can be made.
· Couple counselling quite often involves role plays.
· Couple coaching has no role playing.
Couple coaching creates a safe environment where even the most reluctant partner will feel that self-empowerment is possible and not there to be beaten into submission to change their errant ways. In this safe place both partners can feel confident that they can look at what is causing conflict in their relationship and how that can be turned around to build the relationship they always wanted … but didn’t know how to.
Defensiveness is defined as self-protection in the form of righteous indignation or innocent victimhood in an attempt to ward off a perceived attack. Many people become defensive when they are being criticized, but the problem is that its perceived effect is blame.
If I need to defend myself, I’m feeling attacked and sometimes guilty. Strangely, most humans carry guilt around all the time, even if there’s nothing to feel guilty about. That quiet, persistent guilt just sits there in the background, infecting how we feel about ourselves, poisoning our communications and sickening our relationships.
This existential guilt accounts for our feelings of self-loathing and why we don’t think we measure up to some bizarre standard we’ve set … we’re never clever enough, slim enough, beautiful enough, wealthy enough, popular enough and on and on.
As we recognise and acknowledge that persistently toxic guilt, we can see that it’s with us but not of us. It’s not true and it’s not going away. It’s a persistent fly buzzing around and we can choose to let it annoy us or we can choose not to react. The fly doesn’t care and nor does the guilt.
Then, sometimes, we let someone down. We forget, we get busy, our priorities change, the unexpected happens and we don’t keep our word. We’re humans, not robots, and we forget, change our minds and are pushed around by the world … then we disappoint someone and another level of guilt kicks in, a transient guilt.
So, it’s healthy to recognise that the persistent guilt won’t go away and it’s difficult to avoid the transient guilt from time to time. That’s part of being human – guilt just is.
What we do have a choice about, however, is how we deal with the guilt or any perceived attacks on us.
We can retaliate with attack or we can stay even. When people throw rocks at us, we can throw them back or we can stack them up, stand on them and become bigger people.
Mahatma Gandhi said, “An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind”.
The impact on relationships of defensiveness is huge and can push our partners away emotionally and physically. We want to blame the other for our uncomfortable feelings and the alternative to defensiveness (or attack in response to a perceived attack) is to take responsibility for our feelings and actions … to open our eyes, open our hearts and watch the guilt pass by on the road to nowhere. As we do this, we can let perceived slights, insults and judgements go over our shoulders, not up our noses and choose again the words we use.
For example, if someone asks us why we didn’t do something we’d promised to do, we can either say, with defensiveness:
“You know how busy I am and you’ve got nothing to do so I don’t know why you didn’t do it!!!”
Or, with self responsibility:
“Yes, I’m sorry. I should have realised how busy I was and asked you to do it.”
What’s the difference between these replies?
The real difference is that one is about what someone else did wrong (should have done, the lame blame game) and the other is about what we did wrong (the owning-our-stuff, responsibility game).
When we blame, we give the power and discontent to another; we become lame. When we own our actions, there is no discontent to give and only responsibility to take.
Every word, every sentence, every conversation is a choice. And, yes, in a heated moment, it can be difficult to stand square in our true power, our responsibility, and there is always, always, always another chance to put things right. An apology and a restatement is more powerful than a quick put-down.
Like anything we ever learned, it just takes practice, practice and more practice and, soon, there is no need for blame or apologies, there is just responsibility and power. Relationships become stronger, love becomes sweeter and experiences become joyous.
When you feel defensive, what can you do to stop attacking your partner?
If you mess up and attack, what can you do to take responsibility quickly?
When do you attack the most – stressful times, busy times, feeling bored?
There is hope for a relationship that bounces around on defensiveness, so don’t think that all is lost!
Anna Louise & Philip J Bradbury
Like magnets smacking together, positive and negative unable to resist each other, also in relationships. Opposites don’t always attract but they usually do as we seek out – laser-like and accurately – those who fill our empty spaces.
Harville Hendrix, author of Getting the Love You Need and other books, coined the terms maximiser and minimiser and so, in opposing and frustrating ways we attract our complement, our nemesis, our annoyer, our completion.
Maximisers are the organisers, the list-makers, the diary keepers. They are the ones who will leave nothing to chance, ensuring every minute of every day and every aspect or every event is accounted for. Some might call them manipulators or control freaks. They’re quick to give advice to others whether it’s welcome or not. However, they are the ones to be depended on for a project or event that requires many people or activities to be brought together. They can be reliable, traditional, controlling and/or impatient.
To the minimiser, all this looks like tiresome and pointless work – planning in a world and a future that’s got its own agenda, despite our best attempts to bend its unlimited will to our petty one.
Minimisers are not lazy, though they may see them as such. Their minds are fully occupied but not in the straight-line, plunging-through-the-chaos way of the maximiser but in a more fluid, loving-the-chaos way.
Unlike their nemesis, minimisers enjoy not having answers, not being certain and trusting in the unassailable truth of the universe and their intuition. Forgetting their notes for an important speech may be a tragedy for the maximiser and a wonderful opportunity for creativity and improvisation to the minimiser.
Maximisers like to give and receive advice but minimisers dislike advice from any source but their intuition and will resist telling others their thoughts.
So, once the gooey-in-love honeymoon period is over, the irksome characteristics of your opposite will arise. Your differences don’t mean that you shouldn’t be together. Rather your differences mean you should stay united for, whoever you’re with now, is who you should be with.
So, how do you reconcile the irreconcilable?
Firstly, recognise that any and all lovers will rub you up the wrong way, one way or another. How else are we to smooth our sharp edges?
Secondly, acknowledge who you are and what blows your hair back … and what drives your partner. Realise that no one has the whole answer, the one true way of doing things. Plans are appropriate sometimes, spontaneity at other times. Pushing is appropriate at times, trusting at other times.
Few people are 100% one way or the other but, whatever your tendency, try being the opposite sometimes.
If you’re the planner, the organiser, try sitting back for a moment, “accidentally” leave the grocery list or map at home and relax into the possibility that your life won’t end right now. In fact, it might exceed your plans. Never miss an opportunity to not give advice and see what happens. Whatever it is, the world will probably keep spinning.
If you’re the minimiser, take a risk and offer some advice, remembering that any reaction to it, good or bad, won’t wreck your relationship. Your maximising mate will appreciate that you stepped forward, however clumsily. Choose a day, at least a week ahead, and plan an event – book a restaurant, a holiday, buy a gift, organise some friends into it. It’s a risk for it’s your plan and not the universe’s – you can’t absolve responsibility to anyone else. However, your maximising partner will be grateful you took their burden for a moment, irrespective of how it turned out.
Like a key and a lock, we have to be different shapes to open the door to possibilities. They won’t happen unless we recognise our partner has to be different from us and we’ll benefit from experimenting with being who we’re not, on occasions.
Are you a minimiser or a maximiser? Here is an overview of both states and some questions to get you on the path of self-awareness and turning things around.
Looks like - Has to be done ‘right now’, can be dramatic, pushy, inappropriate at times, dog with a bone attitude, mostly always the instigator.
Benefits: Things do get done, issues do get dealt with, focused, problem solver, reliable.
Costs: Alienates partner/others, anger, frosty connection, pushes partner/others away, serious about life, stressed.
Looks like – Take their time, laid back, relaxed, less drama, things don’t get done quickly – if at all, rarely instigates.
Benefits: Doesn’t have to do much, let’s others take the lead, less responsibility, can do own thing more often, more relaxed about life, less serious.
Costs: Unreliable, things don’t get done, others tire of taking the lead and lack of initiative, let others down, their word is not believed.
Which one do you think you are?
For the maximiser:
What are the benefits of being this way?
What are the costs?
What is the impact of this on your relationship?
What positive aspects of the minimiser would help you form a new way of being with this?
How do you think you could implement these?
What sort of challenges do you think you will face?
How can you overcome them?
What would be the impact on your relationship if you could overcome them?
For the minimiser:
What are the benefits of being this way?
What are the costs?
What is the impact of this on your relationship?
What positive aspects of the maximiser would help you form a new way of being with this?
How do you think you could implement these?
What sort of challenges do you think you will face?
How can you overcome them?
What would be the impact on your relationship if you could overcome them?
For you both
When would you like to start doing putting this into action?
Anna Louise & Philip J Bradbury
There are a number of key factors that contribute to the breakdown of a relationship and contempt is a big one.
1. Physical contact: At the end of every day when you first see each other, before you do anything else, simply hold each other close and relax for a few seconds. At the very least, kiss each other. This allows for the release of oxytocin, known as the cuddle chemical, which helps strengthen your emotional bonds and increase feelings of trust. When you do this you use your physiology to improve your relationship with little effort on your part. It’s a simple act but it can have profound positive effects. Do this every day.
2. Keep talking – even when you are annoyed with each other: Disagreements often involve a misunderstanding. It’s easy to misinterpret your partner’s silence and imagine what they’re thinking. Guessing what the opposite sex is thinking is a very inaccurate science! Disagreements can be resolved a lot faster by simply communicating with one another. You’ve always got to be open to the possibility that you’re wrong – and be willing to apologise.
3. Have your own hobby: There’s pressure on couples to do every single thing together but it’s important to follow our own interests, as well as doing things together. When you have time away from each other it makes the times you when you do things together all the more special. Conversely, if you do not share any interests together, this can create a rift and the relationship can suffer from lack of quality time together.
4. Be honest: Many relationship breakups occur due to a lack of communication and honesty with each other about various things within the relationship e.g. financial values, habits, goals, expectations, parenting style and other friendships. Honest communication from the start of the relationship is an essential element of trust.
5. Show love, respect and gratitude every day: Take the time every day to tell each other the things you love and appreciate about each other and try to not let a day go by without saying “I love you”.
6. Don’t forget what you were like when you first got together: Remember your partner as they were when you chose to enter into a relationship together. Way back when you were each other’s best friends. Remember who YOU were back then and take the time to be a pleasure to be around. When we put effort into recapturing how it used to be and how we used to be, it has a very positive effect and increases happiness.
7. Let them have a bad day: Learn to allow each other to have a bad day without telling each other to ‘snap out of it’. Mostly your partner’s bad mood isn’t about you and it will pass if you give them some space and support.
8. Learn to resolve disagreements in ways that strengthen your relationship: When you are in a relationship where you feel emotionally and physically safe, you can build trust and mutual respect by trying to see the world through your partner’s eyes, not just your own. This is especially important when you disagree because unresolved conflict can turn toxic. Focus more on how you can contribute to the relationship in a positive way rather than trying to change your partner’s behaviour – that is their responsibility. Remember, you control your own behaviour so choose your words and actions wisely.
9. Be thoughtful: Showing your love isn’t just about what happens in the bedroom. It’s also about the caring little things you do for each other around the house. Taking the time to find out what your partner likes, what makes them feel loved, and making an effort to do it.
10. Don’t be mean: Being mean is like declaring war on your likelihood of staying together. There is nothing to be gained by being mean to your partner, through words or actions. A good relationship has its ups and downs but constant meanness is unacceptable and causes long-term psychological and physical problems.
How are you and your partner doing in these areas? Do you need help to create the relationship you want? Contact me for a free 30 minute session to see how couple coaching can take your relationship to a deeper, more connected level.
When we are close to others it is inevitable that we are going to feel what they feel whether life hands them lemons or lemonade. We feel joy for our family members and friends when a happy relationship develops, they receive a financial windfall, a much longed-for baby arrives, etc. We delight with them as they go through spiritual and personal insights that transform and strengthen them and become an inspiration to us on our own journey. But what happens when they go through the difficult times? A marriage ending, falling out with a loved-one, a suicide attempt, a debilitating illness, becoming homeless … we can be thrown into their pain almost as acutely as if it were our own.
Those who play a major part in our lives, who make up the fabric and the tapestry of our stories, will always experience highs and lows and while we are in the process of becoming detached from ego and living from the place of love, the human dramas continue to be played out all around us. Living from the heart, evolving closer towards who we really are (Love) somehow creates more sensitivity to the vibrations around us. We can no longer ignore the pain of people and the planet; we can no longer dismiss the awful or the incomprehensible. We run the gauntlet of human emotions so intensely that it feels as though we live through four emotional seasons in one day! We can breathe a sigh of relief when we return to the comfort of our own home, be grateful that it’s not happening to us but what do we do with the residue of emotions and having our buttons pushed that have probably been triggered from our own similar experiences?
Firstly, a Mindfulness practice of some kind must be the foundation of moving into a more peaceful way of being. Starting the day with spiritual study, prayer and meditation is food for the soul and it calms the senses. While we all have the choice about how we do that, it is vital that we use something to remind us we are one with All That Is and we connect with that Self and the ancient wisdom still held within our cells when we go into the stillness.
Being able to ‘let it go’ will release us immeasurably. A wonderful book to help with this process is David Hawkins’ Letting Go. In this book you will learn how to be with your emotions safely, acknowledge their presence and then quietly, and without drama, let them go. To deny they are there, to try and suppress or repress them will cause them to come out in our physical bodies as illness of some kind. So learning the great ‘letting go’ art will transform our lives.
Evaluating carefully and with conscious awareness about where to spend emotional and physical energy is also very important. Cancel a planned lunch, ask that friend to arrange for someone else to drive him or her to an appointment, turn the computer/telephone/mobile off and watch an uplifting video/DVD or walk in nature or have a massage. Ask someone for what you need – whether it’s just to talk, have a coffee/juice with, or give you a back rub. All these (and others) will boost us physically and emotionally – and we can choose to do so without guilt.
Looking after ourselves while we are looking after others will keep us focused and available, strong and inspiring. How better to help others than this?
Coming to a crossroads in life can be a painful process. Doesn’t it seem like you are just doing your own thing, minding your own business not hurting anybody and then, Wham! before you know it, there are changes a-foot and major decisions to be made. How did I get here? Why? What do I do next? How do I avoid making a mistake? More importantly, how do I avoid making the same mistake again? Why do I feel so alone? How will I know which is the right path to take next?
Here are some tips on effectively coping with change:
What’s the worst that can happen?
Understanding a change is the important first step to managing it because usually we are scared of change and afraid of the unknown. Try to figure out if the worst that can happen is actually as bad as what you think can happen? Learning about the details of the change can help things feel easier. Remember a time previously where change and decision making was scary and yet it all turned out brilliantly. Sometimes it's not as bad as it may seem at first, and it just takes a little time to get used to.
Celebrate the positives
Focusing on the positives can help you feel better about the change overall. They might not be completely obvious to begin with, and it might also take some time, but it’s worth it.
If the unwanted change is within your control, taking an active approach to coping has been shown to be useful. Try engaging in problem solving or goal setting to proactively address unwanted developments. Focusing on the problem at hand, developing a plan of action, and asking for advice are useful active strategies.
If the unwanted change is beyond your control, take a reflective approach. Accepting that there are things beyond your control and choosing to be comfortable with this is likely to bring greater calm than playing the blame game or waging unwinnable wars. Viewing change as an opportunity to learn and grow, rather than a setback, might also help you to turn that frown upside down!
Manage your stress
Improving your ability to handle stress will go a long way to helping you deal with change. Try practicing mindfulness or meditation, or engaging in other relaxation techniques, take a nature walk, have a relaxing bath, listen to calming music. Consider talking to friends or family for advice or emotional support, or by investigating options for professional help.
Don’t forget, it’s perfectly normal to feel overwhelmed if there is too much happening at once. This is when your best approach is to put in place the things that are going to get you through it with as much ease and comfort and as less stress as possible.
When many problems occur at the same time in our lives, all demanding our attention and all needing to be solved, it can become very overwhelming. The brain can experience “fog”, a feeling of trying to think through thick mud. Thoughts that previously followed a seemingly ordered sequence become disordered, words easily found and used as part of that thinking sequence seem have disappeared out of our memory banks and the process of coherent thinking becomes quite illusive. The physical reaction to this kind of mental stress can be quite pronounced. We find it easier to pick up a virus; aches and pains in the body are accentuated, and headaches or migraines develop.
So what would help? Where do we start, how do we start, what is the first thing to? How do we reconnect with our power? How do we move from helplessness, to acceptance and all that that holds, and then onto resolving a problem in such a way as to bring about the highest good for all concerned?
Feng Shui says to declutter and the disruptive energy that is created when our homes are cluttered up with untidy piles of this and that will dissipate. Washing/ironing not done, newspapers lying over tables and couches, beds not made, floors not swept and dirty dishes littering the bench with, at the hottest time of the year, many buzzing flies finding great delight in breakfast, lunch and dinner being available in one place! While it might not seem the obvious place to start, thought patterns respond better in an atmosphere and energy of order. So get to and get tidying, even if and perhaps because, it is the thing you least feel like doing. Take one room at a time starting with the laundry and while the first load is washing start on the next room.
Next, get a clean piece of paper and your favourite pen/s. Make a list of all the things in your life that need attention in no particular order – just as they come to you. No need to do anything more than that. Getting them out of your head and on to paper will make some space in your mind to let solutions manifest themselves. It seems that we can be more objective when we have written things down and it certainly relives the stress. Solutions may even present themselves to you as you write. Otherwise, look at them again when you are feeling less overwhelmed and see what answers turn up.
Now make some space in your day to be quiet. For those who have small children, work full time or just seem to have a hectic life, taking a bath may be the only time you get to yourself but valuable time it is. Eileen Caddy, one of the co-founders of the Findhorn community in Scotland, found the only place she could be alone was in the toilet block! After a busy day she would go to the toilet block at the caravan park where the community was first set up and ended up channelling 3,000 messages during her time there. So, if you are determined to get time to yourself it can be done!
Going out into nature is also a good way of letting the stress slide off your psyche and being nurtured enough to get the thought processes going a coherent way. Attending a meditation group, taking a swim in the sea (whilst warm enough of course), a walk on the beach, in the bush or even the local park. Getting fresh air, some sunshine as well as personal space away from the intensity of the home/work environment makes space in the mind for problem solving.
If you have a friend or family member that you can go to and let off steam and be unconditionally accepted then don’t be afraid you are being a burden. If they are not able to be there for you, they will tell you. If they don’t tell you and it is going to add stress to their lives then they, too, need to work this process and learn how to say ‘No’.
The most powerful part of the process and perhaps the most difficult for most of us is acceptance. To accept the situation and/or persons involved without resistance is a vital step in the resolving process. In Eckhart Tolle’s book The Power of Now in the chapter The Meaning of Surrender -Acceptance of the Now (page 171), he says:
“To some people, surrender may have negative connotations, implying defeat, giving up, failing to rise to the challenges of life, becoming lethargic and so on. True surrender, however, is something entirely different. It does not mean to passively put up with whatever situation you find yourself in and to do nothing about it. Nor does it mean to cease making plans or initiating positive action. Surrender is the simple but profound wisdom of yielding to rather than opposing the flow of life. The only place where you can experience the flow of life is the Now, so to surrender is to accept the present moment unconditionally and without reservation. It is to relinquish inner resistance to what is. Inner resistance is to say “no” to what is, through mental judgement and emotional negativity. It becomes particularly pronounced when things “go wrong,” which means that there is a gap between the demands or rigid expectations of your mind and what is. That is the pain gap. If you have lived long enough, you will know that things “go wrong” quite often. It is precisely at those times that surrender needs to be practiced if you want to eliminate pain and sorrow from your life. Acceptance of what is immediately frees you from mind identification and thus reconnects you with Being. Resistance is the mind.”
It may be necessary to do all these steps at once, to add a few more or to change the order and start with acceptance. Whatever way works for you, approaching problem solving from the place of peace and with the powerful assurance that we are making the right choices is a transforming experience.
As females, we are conditioned to be "real women" by the giving of our nurturing abilities to our partners, children and even, if necessary, elderly parents. We are praised and approved of by parents, partners, friends, siblings and society if we wait hand and foot on someone who happens to be physically or emotionally unwell. We are applauded for putting our own needs to one side, to consider the needs of the unwell person, what might help them and assist them in their recovery.
A taboo subject in many circles is the elephant that sits in the middle of the lounge room that everyone has to walk around but nobody will acknowledge is there. This elephant is the alcoholic, the drug addict, the gambler, the shopaholic, the sex addict, the over eater, the under eater, and even the depressed person, the angry person, the harshly critical and resentful person – generally the member of the family whose behaviour continually causes friction, tension and chaos. Through fear, this behaviour gets left unacknowledged and is not dealt with. The whole family suffers through this unhealthy lack of acknowledgement and everyone learns to live with secrets.
No matter what, the only person we can change is ourselves. So that’s the only place to start – by redefining our own self-image, self-worth and redefining our own needs. Be honest about the elephant in the lounge – if you are in an abusive situation and are keeping it to yourself, tell someone about it even if it is only an anonymous phone call to the Samaritans. Nothing will ever change if you keep quiet about your pain. There are also many wonderful helping organizations from like AlAnon (supporting the friends/loved ones of alcoholics) that can be accessed through Citizens’ Advice Bureau. Counselling, support groups, assertiveness courses, self-awareness courses are also helpful in building up the inner person to cope with and even love the person who is causing so much chaos and distress. And life coaching is a fabulous way to work though your current issues and create a life of peace and happiness.
Once you have become honest about what is going on allow yourself to be led to the right person or therapy for creating a safe place within to boost your self-worth and self-image to the strongest, most amazing place you have ever experienced. This will give you strength to address unhealthy issues and if necessary, make changes. Doing it alone can be difficult but with help, startling life changes will occur on all levels and life can again become an exciting and interesting experience.
Redefining “real women”, women who care enough about themselves to make the necessary changes (inside and out) to live a healthy and happy life, will not only liberate us but those who follow after us – our children.
Hi, I'm Anna Bradbury and I'm an experienced Life Coach and member of ICF (International Coach Federation). I love helping people and couples realise their goals and dreams. With your hard work and focus, my guidance, and proven Life Coaching techniques, you can achieve all you desire.